Most Recent Reviews
Recent Updates
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Apr. 26, 2012Hate Mail » Howling Of The Dim: Masturbating The RetardTeufel - If I had a dollar for every time someone called me gay while hugging another man’s balls, I’d have enough money to pay for their sex changes so they can get that vagina they’ve always wanted.
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Apr. 25, 2012Teufel - BoaConstrictus has been pissing and moaning in the site’s comment section for a couple of years now. Usually I just ignore him, but sometimes, like a dog who won’t stop humping, you just need to roll up a newspaper and whack him with it a few times.
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Mar. 23, 2012Hate Mail » The Black Dahlia NerfherderTeufel - For the record: if you listen to music written by hipsters for doofuses, your opinions about metal are automatically invalid.
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Feb. 20, 2012Teufel - If anyone knows about how to work the balls and stroke the shaft of a band member’s instrument, it’s a Swedish groupie.
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Feb. 1, 2012Hate Mail » What Do You Get When You Cross Four Italian Opeth Fans With A Gorilla? A Retarded GorillaTeufel - Retards come in all shapes and sizes and from all corners of the globe. These four rocket surgeons all come from Italy, all love Opeth and none of them realize they’re only helping prove my point about how much their favorite band fucking sucks. I’m glad we all agree they’re terrible… even if you are too dumb to realize you just fucking agreed with me.
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Dec. 2, 2011Hate Mail » My Retard-To-English Translator Just Exploded…Teufel - We’ve gotten a lot of hate mail over the years, but I’ve never seen anything quite like this before. I don’t even know where to begin… what the fuck?!?!?!?!?!?!
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Nov. 25, 2011Hate Mail » Apparently Machine Head Have Fans Whose IQs Reach Triple Digits, This is Not One of Those FansTeufel - Tyler Turner didn’t take too kindly to me making fun of his attempts to get under my skin, so he decided to respond and put all of his 141 IQ points to work… well… 41 of them anyway.
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Oct. 3, 2011Teufel - Justin puts his degree in psychology to good use by bagging my groceries and crying about sarcastic reviews written on the internet.
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Oct. 3, 2011Teufel - Many people send me e-mails where the gist is I should like something because other people like it, despite my personal opinion being that whatever it is fucking sucks. Thankfully, I ignore these people and their stupid opinions.
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Oct. 3, 2011Hate Mail » Charlie Brown 3:16 – “Good Grief!”Teufel - I get a lot of angry letters from Christians for a variety of reasons, most likely because their pastor made them eat communion wafers out of his pants.
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