There’s nothing like a good meal of hot dogs with sauerkraut, pork and beans, and macaroni and cheese. These meals often give me odd feelings in the intestinal regions. Soon after, the winds of creation are emitted; a creation so foul, so brown, so monstrous that even an elephant would stare in awe. I have a theory that I would like to bring up at the next science convention. I believe that flatulence (or ass-air) smells much more putrid when one is close to dropping a deuce (taking a dump). My theory is that since the logs themselves are so close to falling out, crowning even, that the ass air blows over them so close to the exit that the smell is amplified. A log that was further up in the intestines would not cause such a putrid release of air. And speaking of these winds, I must speak of this album.

I really do not have much to say about this band. My sentiments are similar to the ones expressed for Vomitory’s Blood Rapture. This is fast Polish death metal just like Vader. It’s is extremely boring and its amazing how music so fast and technical is so damn mundane. Apparently these guys were 9 or something when they recorded this disc, but I refuse to let it affect my ideas. They will continue to play this shitty style until they are 30 and opening for some other band that a major label touts as the next Morbid Angel. Actually, now that I think of it, they could open for Opeth and use the ballet that they use to make their shows even more brutal (I just read this in a local paper! We knew it all along!) If you like technical metal in this style, please go out and look for the early masters like Iniquity, Oppressor, and even early Gorefest. There are so many bands out there for years that played this style with much more gusto, innovation, variance, and overall brutality. And do not forget that these bands also added the occasional mosh riff, which really put them at the top of the class for me. I do not know how the style of quick, technical death metal has taken such a turn for the worst. Do your research before you jump on the Metal Blade/Earache bandwagon.

Written By: Double Ds