I’ve heard people hyping Gronibard for years but never bothered to check them out until I saw the hilariously ridiculous artwork for their third studio effort, We Are French Fukk You, and decided to pick up this disc and give it a listen. After listening to this album a handful of times, I can honestly say this album fucking sucks!

As I said, I’m not familiar with Gronibard‘s earlier efforts, but I’m positive that the shit people have been praising isn’t the same steaming turd that these French frog packers have dropped onto this waste of plastic. From what I’ve gathered from talking to longtime Gronibard fans is that Gronibard were once a hilarious porn grind act who played some ridiculously catchy material. This effort… is not grindcore. It’s not funny. The only thing of value from this entire release is the hilarious artwork, everything else is fucking horrible.

Listening to We Are French Fukk You is like being a 6 year old waking up in the middle of the night because you had a nightmare, then wandering into your parents room to snuggle with your mommy, only to open the bedroom door and find your mom in a dominatrix outfit fucking your hogtied father up the ass with a strap-on. It’s just a very unpleasant experience.

The music contained on this release is firmly entrenched in the parody metal genre, and not very good metal at that. Lots of simplistic riffs repeated over and over, with sloppy drumming and annoying vocals with the occasional French audio sample thrown in. I speak French so I understand what’s being said and I can honestly say it isn’t funny in French either. The French have a very odd sense of humor, these people love Jerry Lewis for fuck sake!

I’m sure there was something of value to Gronibard‘s music at some point, either that or my friends all have incredibly shitty taste in music, either way, We Are French Fukk You fucking sucks! I would rather have the dudes from Gronibard take turns farting in my mouth while shoving golf balls up my ass until they came out my mouth than listen to this piece of shit again. It’s too bad that the hilariously awesome artwork is wasted on such a boring waste of plastic as this. I Am Canadian Fukk Gronibard!

Review byTeufel