Back in the day, the styles of most young people was directly correlated to the music that they listened to. You had the hip-hop people, the mainstream metal-heads, the underground metal-heads, hippies, punks, goths, emos, hardcore/hip-hop hybrids, and those people that just blended in. However, there seems to be a new trend – the white, alternative hipster, whose music tastes can vary but a band like Hull would be on the “Top 25 Plays” playlist on their I-Pod.

I like lists. I scribble out lists of the most nonsensical things, things that people would not need a list for. A  recent list compiled the songs that I would like to never hear again, which included “Hey, Soul Sister” and “Crazy Train.” My most recent list was of the standard ways to become a white hipster. Here is the list for your viewing pleasure:

1. Grow some shaggy hair and a “I’m too cool to shave”-type beard

2. Buy flannel shirts, tight jeans, and buy a belt with a Pabst PBR or nautical star buckle.

3. Get a sleeve tattoo for each arm and make sure you roll up the sleeves of your flannel shirt so everyone can see them. What’s the sense of getting a tattoo is no one can see it? Post these pics on Facebook.

4. Move to Williamsburg, Brooklyn and buy a Subaru Forester.

5. State that if you were to move again, it would be to Portland, Oregon.

6. Become a font of useless knowledge. Become the “mayor,” e.g. a person who knows the best subway route to every damn place, how to properly pack a cooler, and is the best at barbecuing, although this person fails to realize that barbecuing involves smoking and sauces and he is actually “grilling.”

7. Consistently profess your love for bacon and all things pork. Know all the most obscure restaurants. Get a friend who owns a restaurant that serves “sustainable” fish and talks about “farm to table” cuisine. Drink craft beer (mainly I.P.A.s and warm cask ales) but have a secret love for $1 PBR night.

8. Find a dive bar where other hipsters hang out. Talk about the greatest bands that you know of, even though, deep down, you know they suck.

9. Find a female with tattoos, who wears flannel shirts, tight jeans, and has a nautical star tattoo. Have sex only in the missionary position.

10. Listen to Hull and Mastodon, and maybe Opeth, when you are sad and lonely.

You may be wondering what this all has to do with the band. It is because when I hear this music, I think of hipsters. Essentially, its a poor man’s Mastodon. Its got those fuzzy guitars, raspy vocals, a “post-hardcore” label, and plenty of corny, atmospheric interludes. Its got a southern feel to it and plenty of Zakk “Mild Style” Wylde solos that are just plain frustrating.  I question if this can really be deemed metal. It’s not really the southern sludge of Eyehategod or Down. I would be tempted to toss around the stoner rock/metal bands like Kyuss, Electric Wizard, and Sleep, but they lack the intensity and “Southern drawl” that these bands have.

This is the type of music that if you went on YouTube! to sample some of their songs, you will frequently find the response of “Epic.” Other reviewers will compare them to Pelican, Isis, and Neurosis. Of course, they will refer the idea of “pushing boundaries.” What the fuck boundary has been pushed? Is it the shock value of an early Cannibal Corpse record? Is it the technical boundaries that were pushed by Death? The atmospheric boundaries pushed by Cynic? The senseless brutality boundary pushed by Devourment? The blurring of male/female gender roles by Culture Club? I am tired of reading reviews of hipster bands written by hipsters who think that an album comprised of ten minute songs, acoustic interludes, raspy vocals, and fuzzy/doomy/psychedelic guitars is awesome and epic.

One reviewer called this album a “sonic adventure.” The only sonic adventure I know of is on my Genesis and consists of a small, blue hedgehog rolling into a ball, destroying shit, and collecting coins that look like onion rings. Don’t be fooled by the hype. This album is nothing more than a boring collection of atmospheric, “experimental” rock or metal with fuzzy guitars and raspy vocals. It is not groundbreaking. Its not even good.

Neurosis did this already. Bloodlet‘s second full-length album did this already. Pelican did this already. Jesu did this already. And as much as I hate to say it, Mastodon did this already. There is even a band called Russian Circles that plays a similar style. Hull threw a southern twist on a style that has been around for a while. Of course, the aforementioned bands have varying styles but the core elements of semi-slow, semi-prodding riffs with a penchant for the atmospheric are ever-present. The problem lies within the fact that Hull had decided to take a bit from each of these bands and blur the lines so that they cannot be categorized as one or the other in an effort to appeal to soft ears. And the end result is an exercise in the mundane.

Review byDouble Ds