BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!? This has got to be a joke, Chris and all the boys sat around the campfire in the swamps of Florida, smoking pot and said, "WELL YA KNOW, SINCE WE RUIN OUR OWN SONGS, HOW ABOUT WE RUIN OTHER PEOPLE’S SONGS?" And so begins the road to ruin known as Graveyard Classics… I really think the lamest thing a band can do is put out an entire album of covers. Normal responses to accusations of lack of creativity to actually go out and record a new album are "WE ARE PAYING TRIBUTES TO OUR INFLUENCES MAN." That’s fucking great, but guess what, I don’t care asshole. I’d much rather listen to you fuck up 12 tracks worth of new material, why just go the lame way? Anyhow on with the review… There are 46 minutes and 7 seconds of complete boredom on this piece of shit. I won’t give a description of every fucking song on this album because I just knowing it exists is torture enough. "TNT" is a classic AC/DC song, now it has been tainted by the ridiculously boring rendition of this great song. Chris can you make your vocals any more boring? I kinda remember when you didn’t sound like someone was taking a shit on your throat and forcing you to gargle. And hey guys, if you are gonna cover "Stepping Stone", don’t call it a Sex Pistols cover, cause the Sex Pistols covered the song themselves. We all know it’s a god damn Monkees song. THERE YOU GO KIDS, YOUR DEATH METAL HEROS COVERED A MONKEES SONG. What’s next? How about some Brady Kids classics? Johnny Bravo, you whores. I think Jello Biafra right now is sitting in his home, crying. A great song he and the Dead Kennedys wrote years ago about Jerry Brown possibly becoming president known as "California Uber Allies" has been reduced to a stupid shadow if it’s former self. Didn’t you morons learn from Slayer? Punk songs covered by metal bands normally just won’t work out. They cover "Smoke On the Water". No more left to say on that. The only redeeming thing that keeps me from telling you that if you own this you are a complete idiot is the fact that the Venom cover is just too damn good to be on here. Unlike the rest of the songs on here, it’s very well done and fun to listen to. Ignore the rest of the album and head to the last track, "In League With Satan". Do yourself a big favor, don’t buy this. Find a friend who was stupid enough to pay for it and copy it from him/her, download it off Napster, or whatever. Just don’t pay money for this hunk of shit. I was gonna give this album a 0 out of 10, but the Venom is pretty damn good. I don’t like the vocals on it very much, but what can I expect, this album sucks.

Written By: Destro