So, Teufel sent out his usual promo packs of stuff to review, and I- being a masochist- volunteered to review this album. Man, I really got to stop doing this if I favor my sanity.

Upon playing Twin Method for 30 seconds, I immediately stopped and made this prediction: every member of the band would have whacky, brightly dyed hair plastered up in spikes and really bad braid work, have at least 1 guy with a super long wallet chain, have a MySpace where most of their fans will be teenage girls with the average age being 16, and I will get an incredibly bad pedophilia vibe if I listened to the rest of the album as it will pull every nu metal cliché out its proverbial sleeve with angst galore.

After hitting MySpace, my prediction was confirmed. The band consisted entirely of guys in badly dyed spiky hair and braids, there was a definite wallet chain reaching down to a band member’s knee, and the average fan was a 16 year-old angst ridden girl. Well shit, I’m fucking psychic. To seal the deal, the band was dressed in a color scheme that made them look like dick-sucking Power Rangers before it was mighty morphin’ time to call down their Faggot Zords and begin a massive kaijin buttfucking orgy. Man, I hate to say it, but Twin Method makes Slipknot look like Silencer in terms of visual product.

But I digress; let’s get back to the music. I should have been forewarned on the music. Twin Method was one of the "lucky" bands to get a spot on the 2007 Family Values tour, featuring such bastions of talent as Hellyeah, Trivium, and everyone’s favorite child-molestation act Korn. And do they ever fit in with those hacks! The Volume of Self features a brand of nu metal that sounds like a cross between a really inept Spineshank, elements of early Chimera, with sprinklings of Orgy and Mudvayne. The vocals sway back and forth between clean, angsty singing and really inept, scratchy yelling. After hearing about two songs, you’d expect one of the lead singers to whip out his dick on stage and furiously masturbate, crying about the time daddy walked in on him and his sister getting on with a Flowers in the Attic moment. The riffs are simply jumpy, melodic riffing that is no different from the legions of acts you hear on alternative/"new" rock radio stations, and the drumming is nothing more that an accessory to the music. The nu metal features the heavy reliance on melodic programming found on a Spineshank or American Head Charge album, and needless to say it’s pretty shitty. Twin Method merely is a faceless nu metal clone; you can probably buy the act as a blue light special at K-Mart, but why you would want to is beyond me.

If any of your friends’ younger sisters try to trick you into chaperoning them to Family Values, or a possible one night fling you meet in an Irish pub tries to convince you to give the record a spin, just say no. Wait no, beat them. That would be more appropriate. The Volume of Self is nothing more than typical nu metal garbage; this is so degenerative and poor that I’m surprised the band hasn’t killed itself outside a Hot Topic yet. Written By: Necro-tron