It’s funny to look at the state of black metal today. Yeah, guys like Darkthrone are still putting out the good low fidelity, blackened music that we all know and love, but for the most part about 90% of black metal is insanely homoerotic. Just look at most photos of men decked out in corpse paint and spikes: they’re not fearsome, menacing, or ferocious. Instead they look like men who have played Vampire: The Masquerade LARP games for so long that their gentiles have inverted into man-ginas and their sexual preference has been changed into the gay pedophilia from an Anne Rice novel. How can you honestly fear a guy who looks like his bones are made of pencils, has non-existent skin pigment, and probably eats out the greasy, lard-lathered pussy of his 450 pound girlfriend in the basement of his mom’s house that he house yet to move out of, despite being 36? Needless to say, if you listen to black metal there’s a good chance you need to raise your head out of Helga the Man Ape’s pussy to read this and take a breather before venturing back into the Forbidden Zone.

Luckily, there still are damn good black metal acts that make these fuckers proud of the lard spelunking. And Xasthur is one of them. This one-man band takes everything great about raw, intense, atmospheric black metal and smashes it into your skull like a fucking morning star. Sounds like it was produced inside a tin can thrown around the cargo bay of a U-Haul truck? Check. Atmospheric pieces that are simplistic yet soulful and nihilistically bleak? Check. Does it have hateful, scornful vocals that sound like they are being emitted from the 70 year-rotted corpse of a hung priest that is now possessed by Baphomet? Check. Are there some of the best parts of Burzum without the annoying keyboard abuse? Check. Yeah, there is a picture of Xasthur’s Malefic decked out in corpse-paint, but fuck, when you got this kind of music coming out of your nightmares you’re allowed the paint.

In a world full of 36 year-old momma’s boys eating out Helga the Man Ape’s doughy pussy and Cradle Of Filth dominating the sales at the local Hot Topic, there is always some form of blackened, evil hope for black metal fans. That hope is To Violate the Oblivious and its messiah is Xasthur.

Written By: Necro-tron